Well I must say that I'm in awe of you guys who pick up your dog's shite (the on-street evidence here in Bude would suggest that you're in a minority). But I can't get my head around the fact that you're prepared to handle that still-warm, stinking mess through the ultra-thin plastic of a doggie-bag which then becomes a scrotum-like appurtenance that you either take home, deposit in an insanitary bin that is part-financed by us non-dog owners, or is left dangling on a bush when no-one's looking. I would never criticise you within earshot for picking up the ordure, but I reserve the right to question the mindset of anyone willing to cart a dangly bag of shit around for, well, who knows how long...

They say that golf is a good walk spoiled. Well a dangly quasi-scrotum of dogshit that I'd be obliged to lug around would easily have the same impact on me. Now who's looking, and where's the nearest bush...