Here you are, Joe. "There's so much more to fail to do." is a great line.

Partygate

I hear you're cross and well I know
That some will say that I must go

But history calls, it is my fate
To stay to steer the ship of state.

Once more folk think that I'm inept
For breaking laws that others kept.

That suitcase full of beer and wine
Seemed work-related - all was fine.

Some were not pleased that we decide
To party on while others died.

Some still think that I'm a fool
But I know I was born to rule.

So once again I need to try
Sackcloth and ashes, humble pie.

The fact that I keep talking shite
Somehow, sometimes, comes back to bite.

Sometimes the plebs don't realise
It's nothing much - they're only lies.

I want to go on serving you
There's so much more to fail to do.

I break the laws sometimes and I
Find doing that leads me to lie.

It's not the lie, it's not the law
The thing that hurts me rather more,

The only thing I care about
The fact that I have been found out.

I live my life from lie to lie
It's always worked - God knows why.

It worked with mistresses and wives,
Affairs of state and people's lives.

I do the least I need to do
And somehow seem to muddle through.

Life may be hard and some may dread
The thought of harder times ahead.

However hard your life may be
You'll find that I looked after me.

Les Barker