I once asked an elderly friend whom I met walking down the hall: Hi! How are you?
Trundling along with her walker, she responded: Well enough to sit up and take nourishment.

I and my brothers used to taunt each other: He thinks he's a wit- and he's half right.

I asked an elderly friend whom I had escorted to the bathroom: Did you have a BM? She said cheerfully, Nope. Just wind and water.

And one I expect to see one day is one that came out of my own mouth, leaving me and my listener awe struck: If he were dead, he'd be rolling in his grave. (Huh?)