Poems are for Singing From the Notes of Vince Hearns



The Templetown Goose
I collected this song from John O Byrne from Co. Wexford at Fleadh in Listowel. Co. Kerry in 1985. According to John, it was written by a Jack McCutchen and won the ballad writing competition at the ÉIGSE P.J. McCALL in 1983.

THE TEMPLETOWN GOOSE

In sweet Ballylannon, on the road to Duncannon
With a small bit of farming I led a quiet life
I ploughed a few acres and sowed a few taters
And the fowl and the dairy left in charge of the wife
Says she to me Johnny, you are my own honey
And ambitions for money or fame I’ve no use
But a small bit we’ll squander to amuse the grey gander
If you will go out and buy me a beautiful goose.

CHORUS
Ah, but she was a darling, both handsome and charming
And a great one to ramble if e’er she got loose
Away she would wander, but her steps I’ll soon hinder
When I give the grey gander to the Templetown goose.

It being early one morning at the break of the dawning
I pumped up my wheels and westward I set sail
In the Hook I soon landed where my wish it was granted
When I spied this fine goose and she chewing barley meal
Said I to her owner, now if you will disowner
A price I will quote that you cannot refuse
With a small bit of arguing, we struck up a bargain
And I started for home with the Templetown goose.
Chorus

My chickens I’d counted before I was mounted
For to leave her surroundings this bird hadn’t planned
Her wings she did flutter and when I overtook her
She was washing her toenails on Dollar Bay Strand
I did some hard slogging chasing her through Killoggon
She led me through Lewistown and Haytown and Ralph

She next started skin diving off the rocks in Carnivan
After ten hours I caught her and tied her up safe
We approached Balliniry and again she felt firey
Once more she escaped me and flew to Dunmain
I traversed Mullinderry to the Ballyhack ferry
And t’was in Passage East she was captured again
Oh she had me tormented and sorely demented
She wore out my tyres and my socks and my shoes
Exhausted and shaken, the wife I did waken
When past midnight I brought home the Templetown goose.
Chorus

Now this bird she was speedy and grasping and greedy
But with the grey gander she soon met her match
When she went into action to my great satisfaction
A brood of young goslings in a few weeks she hatched
There are rare ones and fair ones, square ones and quare ones
Like their mother they swear and give dog’s abuse
But now she is spancelled, her freedom is cancelled
And the speed is gone ‘offa’ the Templetown goose.