The Princess and the Frog
Tune: When Stormy Winds Do Blow, the Watersons
Words: F the Ineffable

One fine October morning
Down by Big River side
A maid meandered down the sand
To view the flowing tide.
        Being lovely, lithe and lonely,
        She sat down on a log.
        By a waterfall she heard the call
        Of a tiny long-tailed frog.

His tender skin was emerald green
Bedecked with flecks of gold.
He was a living breathing gem
A splendour to behold.
        He glimmered in the morning light
        That filtered through the fog
        And rainbows from the waterfall
        Played gaily round the frog.

“O lovely lady, take me home,”
This brilliant creature cried.
“And whisper ardent words of love
And say you’ll be my bride.
        And if you kiss my froggie lips
        Beneath yon flowering quince
        I’ll shed my slimy skin, and I’ll
        Become a handsome prince.”        

“Oh darling, precious froggie-poo
I’ll make for you a bed,
With chocolate treats and silken sheets
And pillows for your head.
        But I’ll not kiss your froggie lips
        Beneath yon flowering quince
        For there is nothing I need less
        Than one more handsome prince.”

“For I’ve had men a-plenty
From Zanzibar to Prague
I’ve screwed the best and scorned the rest,
But I’d love a talking frog.”