Henry the Seventh written by Marriott Edgar

Henry the Seventh of England wasn't out of the Royal top drawer,
The only connection of which he could boast was King's nephew's brother in law,
T was after the War of the Roses that he came to the front as it were,
When on strength of having Killed Richard the Third he put himself up as his heir.

T was a bit of a blow for the barons when Henry aspired to throne,
And some who'd been nursing imperial hopes started putting out claims of their own,
They didn't get far with their scheming for as soon as the matter was pressed,
A stroke of the pen sent them off to the tower where a stroke of the axe did the rest.

A fellow they called Perkin Warbeck was the one that led Henry a dance,
To make sure nowt awkward should happen to him he worked from an office in France,
He claimed to be one of the princes who had been smothered to death in the tower,
His tale was that only his brother had died and he had escaped the sees over.

Henry knew the appeal of the princes was a strong one for Perkin to make,
He thought he best have a chat with the lad and find out the least he would take,
In reply to his kind invitation Perkin said “he'd be happy to call,
But he'd bring his own escort of ten thousand men and a hundred pipers an all”.

The reply put the king in a passion he swore that he'd stop Perkin's fun,
Then he offered a fortune per annum to him who could tell him how this could be done,
Then up spoke the bold Lambert Simnel the kings private scullion he were,
He said “a word in thy ear'ole o king I've a plan which will stop all this 'ere”.

He took the king up in a corner where noone could hear what they said,
He 'hadn't got far when king started to laugh and he laughed till he had to be bled,
'twas a plan to anticipate Perkin by getting in first with these tales,
Start another rebellion before he arrived and take the wing right out of his sails.

So Lambert Simnel's rebellion made its fateful début in the north,
Experts disagree who he made out to be John the second or Richard the Fourth,
'T was surprising how many believed they flocked to his flag like one man,
For in them days folk would do owt for a change and their motto was San fairy Anne.

'T was quite a success his rebellion till were routed by Henry at Stoke,
And Lambert was taken and made to confess that his parents were working class folk,
The public forgave his deception the thing that made them proper mad,
Were the tuppeny increase on everyone rates to pay for the fun that they'd had.

So when Perkin Warbeck came over expecting his praise to be sung,
He was greeted, defeated, ensheated unseated maltreated and finally hung,
The Baron twent back to his castle the peasant went back to his herd,
Lambert Simnel went back to his scullions job cause Henry went back on his word