Christmas in Jail
Joyner Burton Lee Sr. (w. minor adaptations)

INTRO: Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas,
        Happy New Year to you, but for me it’s.

Christmas in jail, Christmas in jail
        I had a little too much to drink
I ain't got no bail
Gotta pee in a pail
        I'm spendin' New Year's Eve in the clink

I was feelin' no pain
And in the wrong lane
        Doin’ ‘bout seventy-five
When I ran right into
You can guess who
        and they say I'm lucky to be alive

Merry Christmas
Happy New Year
They're singin' down the street
While everybody's havin' Christmas turkey,
I’m gonna get bread and water to eat

Christmas in jail
Christmas in jail
        I wore my shoes out pacin' the floor
I got lumps in my bed
And rocks in my head
        Ain't gonna drink and drive no more.

Repeat last two stanza with ending:
Ain't gonna drink and drive no more, No ...
ain't gonna drink and drive no more, No ...
ain't gonna drink ... and drive ... no more.

No I won’t. No I won’t. Won’t I ever learn?!?