Question for the group: How long does an opened jar of Hellman's mayonnaise remain trustworthy? It lives in the back corner of the refrigerator, whence it has hardly moved since Edmund died.

The use-by date is ... um ... 10 November 2020. Oh, dear.

However, it shows no sign of degradation: it smells as it should, it's still fully emulsified, and I saw nothing untoward in the jar once I had identified certain dark flecks as thyme leaves, consistent with my only use for mayonnaise, in chicken salad.

As for Christmas lights: phooey. This year I decline to play along; my neighbours have already filled their yards with enough illuminated gimcrackery to drain half the turbine output from Niagara Falls. My house stands out as a black hole in the evening streetscape.

But I'm not a total Scrooge: I've made two batches (three loaves each) of fruitcake and will probably crank out a third -- the oven ran a bit hot for the first batch and it came out a bit dark. Liberal application of rum solves most of that problem, but it's still not what I'd call prezzie quality. I'll eat it myself, slice by slice over months and months. Nothing like fruiitcake with a large cup of tea.