Bert mentioned this on 11-Jan-00. Words from the video at YouTube, performed by Winchester/Perry (Christine Winchester and David C. Perry). You can also hear the audio at the Winchester/Perry website, or click here for the mp3 file.


MR. NICOTINE MAN
“A second-hand song about smoking”
Words by David C. Perry, music, “Mr. Tambourine Man” by Bob Dylan.

[Spoken] Here with a public announcement for the American Tobacco Growers Association in conjunction with the American Cancer Society, is smokesperson, Mr. Bob Dylan.

[Chorus] Hey, Mister Nicotine Man, save a puff for me.
Quitting smoking’s such a drag to do.
Hey. Mister Nicotine Man, save a puff for me.
Sacred cigarette smoke, I’ll come swallowing you.

I tried those sissy cigarettes with hardly any tar,
Six packs today so far,
Plus a pipe and a cigar,
But I’d still walk a mile for a Camel Plain.
My old lady said that when we kiss, I taste like an ashtray.
And I said, “That’s OK,”
And then she moved away.
Well, some folks can’t tell pleasure from pain. [Chorus]

O sweet Virginia leaves, you know, I’d sell my soul for you,
My lungs and larynx too,
Hold my breath till I turn blue.
My heart is pure but the air I breathe’s corrupt.
Though I know Tobacco Road can lead me only to despair,
Well, I don’t really care,
’Cause I’m already there,
And when you’re down this far, you might as well light up. [Chorus]

Though you might hear coughing, hacking, gasping like I can hardly breathe,
Don’t you pay it any heed,
’Cause it ain’t air I need.
Just gi’ me some more weed,
’Cause after all, there’s more to life than breath.
At least it’s somewhat safer than sucking on a gun,
And almost as much fun.
Hell, there’s no real damage done.
The condemned get one last smoke before their death. [Chorus]