Some stories have happy endings, and some stories have endings that are anything but.
Living a story like yours, Mrrzy, is not for the faint of heart.
The estrangement between your twin sons is surely complex, and to navigate the present situation you need to use your head as well as your heart.
It's not easy for you to be there for each of your sons;
but what you relate proves that you are indeed there -- for both of them.
All this is a clumsy attempt on my part to say, Take heart.