My Aunt's name is Emelina Waterbutt
She lives down on Burton on Trent
Every time she rides upon a bicycle
She always gets her handlebars bent.

Steak and kidney seven and a tanner's worth
A little bit of chicken on a mauling spike
Gentleman farmers are never what they're taught to be
Plastic pyjamas are never what they ought to be

Seventeen fiddles in a secondhand suitcase
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday
Oh what a silly, silly song!