OK, here's one for the oldies ....

Noah is leaning on the doorpost of the Ark, glowing with the satisfaction of a job well done: the Ark has grounded, the door is open, the beasts have gone forth, and he's just finished muckin' out their pens. Then he hears an awful racket:

brUmmm brrrRRRRRRRRR *crunch*
brUmmm brrrRRRrrrRRRrrrRRRRRRR *crunch*

What's this? thinks he, and goes to investigate. He follows the noise, and finds a freshly-cut clearing in the forest, in which two snakes are, erm, snake-handling a chainsaw and about to fell another tree.

"What's all this?" says he. "I said 'Go forth and multiply', not 'Go forth and demolish the environment'."

"But we're adders," say the snakes. "If you want us to multiply, we need log tables."