Could it be...?

My Favorite Things…aging parody (Em/G)

Em
Maalox &                       nose drops and          needles for         knitting,
Cadillacs,            cataracts,                  hearing aids,         classes,
E
Hot tea &                       crumpets and          corn pads for         bunions,
Back pains, con- fused brains, and   no need for         sinning,
C
Walkers &         handrails and         new dental             fittings,
Polident,                 Fixodent,                 false teeth in             glasses,
A
No spicy                 hot food or         food cooked with onions,
Weak bones & fractures and         hair that is             thinning,
Am                   D                      G                     C
Bundles of         magazines         tied up in                 strings,
Pacemakers,         golf carts, and         porches with         swings,
Bathrobes &         heating pads,         hot meals they bring,
And we won’t         mention our         fast-shrinking         frames,
G                     C                      Am                     B
These are a         few of my         favorite                   things.    …to red
These are a         few of my         favorite                   things.   …to Bridge #1
These ere a    few of my                favorite                 things.    …to blue
When we   re-        member our         neighbors’ last   names. …to Bridge #2

            Em                                 Am
    #1…When the pipes leak, when the bones creak,
    #2…When the joints ache, when the hips break,
    Em                            C
    When the knees go bad,
    When the eyes go dim,
       C             Am                G          C
    I simply remember my favorite things,
    And then I remember the great life I’ve had,
             Am                              G
    And then I don’t feel so sad.   (…to green)   
    And then I don’t feel so grim.