COME AND JOIN US

Chorus:

Come and join us, come and join us,
Come and join our happy army,
Come and join us, come and join us,
Come and join our happy throng.

Sister Anna, you'll carry the banner,
But I carried it last time,
You'll carry it this time, next time, and every bloody time,
But I'm in the family way,
You're in everybody's way,
But I'm pregnant,
You're stagnant.
The whip, the whip,
No, anything but the whip,
Anything?

The whip, the whip.
Come with me to the bedroom,
But I want to go to the pictures,
There are pictures on my wall,
But I want to go to the movie pictures,
They will soon be moving.

Come with me to the woods,
But I'm only thirteen,
Little girl, this is no time to be superstitious,
I'll tell the vicar,
Little girl, I am the vicar.

Come with me to the casbah,
But mummy wouldn't like it,
Your mummy's not going to get it.

Where are you?
I'm hiding, I'm hiding,
Where are you?
I'm still hiding,
When I catch you I'm going to .... you,
I'm under the stairs, I'm under the stairs.

I like taking experienced girls home,
But I'm not experienced,
You're not home yet.

Owing to many recent arrivals in this village, those members of the
congregation who have been placing buttons in our collection plate are
requested to replace the same by SAFETY PINS.

Members of the congregation are requested not to write racing
information in the backs of our hymn books as the practice is
irreligious and the information contained therein is most ERRONEOUS.

Members of the congregation are requested not to throw banana peel
around this establishment as several of our young ladies have SLIPPED
OF LATE.

Members of the congregation are requested not to throw their cigarette
buts into the urinals as it makes them soggy and hard to light.

Members of the congregation are requested to have their building fund
contributions in by Thursday as I will be leaving the parish on
FRIDAY.

During my absence wife will be carrying on as usual WITH THE BISHOP.

All those young ladies wishing to join the mother's club are requested
to see me in the vestry AFTER THE SERVICE.

In order to combat growing alcoholism in this community, next Sunday
we will ceremoniously empty all wine barrels into the river. We shall
now sing hymn number 352 in the red book or number 426 in the white
book, "SHALL WE GATHER AT THE RIVER."

ca 1960. Queensland University (St. Lucia) Hockey Club Song Book pp.60-61.