Boy, the way Bing Crosby played
golf that made his driver fade
Guys like me we had it made
Those were the days
Didn't need abortion fate
ev'rybody pulled his weight
gee our Oldsmobile ran great
Those were the days
And you knew who you were then
girls were girls and men were men
Mister we could use a man like Gen'ral Jackson again
People seemed to be content
fifty dollars paid the rent
freaks lived in a circus tent
Those were the days
Take a little Sunday spin
go to watch the Yankees win
or have yourself a lynching day
where white folks wore a big grin
those were the days
Hair was short and skirts were long
Kate Smith really sold a song
I know exactly what went wrong
Those were the days
The Klan had a really nifty plan
Everybody understands
what their place is in this land
Those were the days

Now that UFOs are real
What's the big fat hairy deal
They've been here all along
Those were the days.