My apologies if this ice-cream-truck-inspired parody of Greensleeves has already been posted to Mudcat. I don't know who wrote it (but it wasn't me!).

Poor Grandma died and in her will
She left me her love and her doctor’s bill
A moth-eaten cat that was always ill
And a little machine that played Greensleeves.

I had an idea and quick as a wink
I bought an old van and I painted it pink
With a freezer that came from an ice-skating rink
That only worked when I played Greensleeves.

Business was booming, I owned a fleet
My vans went tinkling down every street
The jingle of money was oh so sweet
I’ll bet the pied piper played Greensleeves.

Greensleeves at the rooster’s crow
The grocer’s body swings to and fro
He was condemned, he had to go
For throttling a man who sang Greensleeves.

(slowly with feeling)
Last week they shot my best icecream man
Today they blew up my nineteenth van
For the grocers have formed their own Ku Klux Klan
And the robes that they wear all have green sleeves.

Now the army’s made tanks out of every van
To send to the jungles of Vietnam
Australia’s the envy of Uncle Sam
‘Cause Yanks don’t have tanks that play Greensleeves.

But the army’s got problems I’m telling you
They can sell pink tanks when the war is through
But what in the world are they going to do
With a hundred machines that play Greensleeves?