I've been in treatment now for six years.
And I am noticing one big change.

Six years ago, I was terribly reluctant to make music any more.
I still felt hurt and wounded inside, and when I felt like that, it actually seemed to hurt to make music, so I stopped, for years.
This has changed slowly and gradually over time, with treatment,
and with participating in the chorus that I enjoy singing with.

Yesterday I got the notion to look up a fellow student from university.
We have been out of touch for decades;
but I was aware that she had an operatic career of some distinction.
So I Googled my old classmate to see what had happened to her.

There was more going on there than met the eye.
She had her very successful career in opera for years.
Then she had a health setback; it was a neurological issue affecting her hearing and her balance, nothing was wrong with her singing voice.
She had to stop performing completely and get treatment for maybe five years or so.
Then she gradually resumed performing again.

The thought crossed my mind, if she can do it, maybe I can do it too.
I found that I felt excited and happy at the idea of playing the piano again,
when previously I shied away from doing any such thing.
This is something I scarcely dared hope for when I started treatment,
I feared that I would have that wounded feeling inside for the rest of my life, and be unable to make music at all.

So it seems that a real healing is taking place at last.