We don't lift our pinkies in Orillia
We don't put crankcase oil in our hair
We run our snowmobiles right up till Easter
And we don't shoot moose except when hunting bear
Yes, we're proud to be Orillians from Orillia
A place where any fool can run for mayor
Even flattop ran for mayor once in Orillia
Which tells you that this town is more than fair
So shed a tear if you're not from Orillia
And drown your sorrows in the local hootch
In time, with any luck that stuff'll kill ya
Just like the water down in old Lake "Couch"

* (Lake Couchiching...one of the spectacular bodies of water upon which Orillia resides. The other is Lake Simcoe. You can walk across either one of them in the winter, with any luck...or try snowmobiling over stretches of open water for a real thrill! There are people dying for a chance to do that, in fact. Regularly. Mostly young men with IQ's under 72, and baseball caps on backwards, under their parkas.)

- LH

p.s. flattop did not win. Too bad. It would have been interesting...