Dearest Catspaw.

Shortly you will receive a new Martin D-45 guitar, a Corvette, the phone number of Marisa Tomei, and a lifetime supply of Viagra.

I'm currently reading every post you've ever made for overt or hidden wishes. They will be fulfilled every one.

By the way, I'm a little short this week. Could you spare a couple of those sets of strings? Not the ELIXERS, by the way. I've got my pride!

John Beresford Tipton

P.S. I'm NOT sleeping with Michael Anthony!