I'm surprised nobody's told this one.

Sam Clam and Ollie Oyster were best friends all their lives. They ate together, slept together, played together -- let's face it, they were really together.

Then, horribly, one day they die.

For reasons which aren't relevant to the story, Sam Clam goes to hell, and Ollie Oyster goes to heaven.

Ollie Oyster checks into heaven, gets his wings, his harp, and starts to get a little bored, if the truth be told.

Meanwhile Sam Clam goes to Hell and becomes, after a little wheeling and dealing, the proprietor of a dance club. Apparently in this particular circle of Hell, souls whose mortal sin was not dancing enough while on earth are forced to dance for eternity to endless tape loops of 1970's disco music. Badly edited.

After a while Ollie applies for permission to visit Hell, and see his buddy Sam.

Permission is granted, and he trips off down the Stairway to Heaven (see, this is musically related!) (actually if you're tripping DOWN it would be the Stairway FROM Heaven, but let's not get technical). After a little asking around, he finds his best earthly friend, Sam.

They have a good chat, but suddenly Ollie glances at his Rolex (you get those with your wings; I forgot to mention) and sees his furlough is about to expire. Heedless of Sam's goodbyes, he pumps it as fast as his little shell can take him, back up the stairway to heaven, and through the Pearly Gates, just as they're closing for the evening.

"Haven't you forgotten something?" booms a magesterial voice.

"Oh no!" Ollie cries.........

(cue music)

I left my harp in Sam Clam's disco...