The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #33702   Message #450949
Posted By: GUEST
28-Apr-01 - 05:08 AM
St. Peter is sitting behind a desk at the gates of Heaven, dealing with the line of new arrivals. "Smith - sorry, down those stairs. Jones? Very good, please go through those gates over there...." And on and on. Then suddenly he leaps up and comes round the desk to greet the next applicant with an embrace and a handshake.

"Mr. Cohen - welcome to heaven! It's a priviledge to have you here. Welcome, welcome!"

Cohen is non-plussed. "Me? You sure you got the right Cohen?"

"Certainly!" says St. Peter "Only a man of your outstanding modesty could doubt it. You've led an exemplary life, we don't see one person a year coming through your qualifications. Look, there is a choir of angels waiting to welcome you on the other side of the gates."

Sure enough, Cohen can see wonderful sights through the wide open pearly gates, including a glorious choir of angels preparing to sing. He starts to move forward politely so he can listen to them.

"One moment," says St. Peter, "there is one small formality. We're trying to improve conditions down there, and we're running a little survey of the more outstanding citizens to see what needs to be done. Would you mind answering a few questions?"

"Certainly, certainly, it's the least I can do, and to tell you the truth, it sounds like a good idea"

"Thank you. And the first qestion is - what is the worst thing that happened to you down there?"

Cohen goes white as a sheet, and refuses to answer, just stands there with an angry look on his face. St. Peter asks again. Cohen just shakes his head.

St. Peter says "I'm sorry, we must have the answer to this question before you can go through those gates."

Cohen takes a deep breath and starts to yell. "You wanna know? I'll tell you!" His voice rises to a crescendo. "My son, my son became a Christian!"

"Quiet, not so loud!" says St. Peter "We don't talk about that here. It happened to the boss"