Poor banjo players get even less respect than bodhran players!

True story: My city's opera and symphony had a big fight over the cost of musical accompaniment to the opera. The opera director's final word was "We'll go ahead without them. We'll find a piano or two, maybe a couple of banjos."

I thought the whole thread was hilarious (even as a retired banjoist), and I'm going to take up the Uillean pipes in the morning. Where do I find these beautiful, exotic foreign women? I hope I don't have to learn to play them well, or anything, for the effect to work.