I used to enjoy smoking a doobie and doing yard work. It used to go something like this...

1) Fire up doobster, relax for a few minutes to enjoy sun and fresh air

2)Start by deciding to water garden, go to garage for hose

3)While in Garage, decide to clean off work bench

4)Take broken footstool, which wife has placed on workbench, out to trash can

5)Pick up pieces of McDonald's bag scattered around trash can

6)Put trash can in shed to avoid dog getting into trash again

7)Find old copy of Fabulous Furry Freak Bros in shed, start to read it

8)Realize that I'm goofing off when there's work to do, but decide to put comic book in bathroom for later perusal

9)While passing through bedroom, find empty half-bag of cheetoes daughter has left on dresser

10)Decide that something more substantial than Cheetoes are needed before taking on enormous work-load

11)Sit at Kitchen table, dipping pretzels in mustard while reading comic book, deny being stoned to wife

12)Go back outside, trip over hose, and realize initial objective was to water bushes

13)Turn on hose and start to water bushes while humming Rick Fielding's Wind and Rain

14)Turn off hose, go in and put Fielding's CD on outside speakers

15)Leaving through garage, notice partly completed workbench project, and continue putting away clutter

16)When wife calls "are you running the hose?" respond in the negative, but realize that bush-watering still not done.

17)Again deny being stoned to wife

et cetera. You get the picture.