Big, Bad Doc
tune: Big, Bad John

He was six-foot-four, and strode into OR
With a wad of Copenhagen and a three-inch scar
With sh*t on his boots and his hair black with tar,
That's Doc.
(Big Doc, big Doc, big bad Doc)

He wore silver scalpels on his snake-boot heels
And if he showered more, he'd have sex appeal
And whenever he spoke, it wasn't too genteel
That's Doc. (etc.)

No ordinary ordinary showed him the ropes
He wore leather holsters for his stethoscopes
And he growled, "Ye varmints!" at the working dopes
That's Doc.

Now the nurses didn't mind this Yosemite Sam
Till he tried to install his spitoon can
In the OR next to where the oxygen stands
That Doc.

One day in OR they took him to task
He wouldn't operate without his "Lone Ranger" mask,
A bandana 'round his neck, and a hip-pocket flask,
That's Doc.

(ritardando)
Now he's out on leave underneath the Big Sky
That snuff-chewin' surgeon who's none-too-shy
And the nursing staff say, "That's one weird, weird guy."
That's Doc.

(a tempo)
Big Doc, Big Doc, Big bad Doc.

©2001 Alex Riggle. All Rights Reserved.