although (in total ignorance of any facts) one does wonder where he was with his support the last 7 years

Mrrzy, I think you should take note of what you put in brackets there. And so should the others who are unloading blame on the husband, also "in total ignorance of any facts".

It's not our business to go round making judgement and blaming people when we don't know the facts. Casting blame doesn't help, finding out the reasons and learning from them that is what matters.