Thanks hg, I agree.

SharonA, thank you,too. That was a long time ago. I've been through a second, very short marriage, and my third one, which has lasted 21 years with him having adopted all three of my children and helping to raise them. It hasn't always been ideal, but there has never been that type of abuse ever again in my life. Thank you very much for your concern and compliments. The Mudcatters are a very incredible lot of people and will do anything possible to help anyone who asks. I hoep you can join as a member sometime, soon. That way you can share private messages, as well as do other things, such as trace specific threads, etc. I hope you have found ease form the abusiveness you've experienced, too.

McGrath, what can I tell ya? We went through this during COlumbine, during the Russian submarine sinking with all of the men trapped. We are a curious lot and we do try to be careful about how we term our speculations. It is human nature to discuss the horrors and the joys of our times. I understand the horror of what less kindly sites may be saying and I understand your concern that it is not fair.

As you have seen, though, I have been a victim, of much mroe than I worte of above. I did not say I was blaming the father, only that I had questions, most of which will probably never be answered.

As for how he might feel if he read or heard the speculations of complete strangers? That goes back to one of my earliest posts on this thread and my belief system of karma and choosing our families, etc. It does not mean I think he deserves this and has to go through it without any support etc.; just that at some level, his higher consciousness had an awareness and will help him to deal with this. Some would use the old adage about god not giving us more than we can handle.

Well, I hope I didn't just make a muddle of what I was trying to say.

Thanks,

kat