I have just finished my second plate of tripe this week and made and awful discovery.

My name is Dave. I am a tripeoholic.

There. I've said it now and it wasn't easy.

Mine's a sad tale. I tried a bit of liver and onion years ago. I thought it would do no harm. Then the butcher convinced me to try a little kidney. It went downhill from there. Lambs sweetbreads. Ox tonge. Heart. Pigs trotters and then I hit rock bottom.

Tripe.

I know it's disgusting. I disgust myself at times but I can't help it. I have lost the respect of my children. I have to sneak it to the back of the fridge so my wife won't find it. Now I'm worried that if my boss finds out I will loose my job.

I must give it up but I love it too much. The taste. The texture. The smell. How it slips down when covered in salt, pepper and vinegar. I have even started to experiment by deep frying it in batter. Using balsamic vinegar instead of malt. Giving it a delicate dusting of paprika... Mmmmmm.... No, no stop it. It's evil.

Please, please help. Can we have a self help group. It need not be tripe. Anything weird will do. But help me.

And help me now before it is too late....

Dave the repentant Gnome