Why Gaelic in particular?

Can someone supply Gaelic lyrics which mean "I'm a wooly-jumpered singer with a finger in my ear", or "sod the lot of you, I'm off to the pub to get wasted"? ;-)

I know a bloke who sings something that sounds very like a Russian folk song/dance. It took some time b4 I found out it was complete nonsense, and he'd invented it himself - the fun bit is though that he sings the same words every time, and puts expression into it so that it sounds like it's a genuine thing!

Graham.