Grunty Was His Name-ey
(Tune: "Bingo (was his name-o)"

There was a farmer had a pig
And Grunty was his name-ey
G - R - U - N - Ty
G - R - U - N - Ty
G - R - U - N - Ty
And Grunty was his name-ey

He had a TV show so big,
"Pig at the Ritz" its name-ey
P - Et - Cet - e - ry
P - Et - Cet - e - ry
P - Et - Cet - e - ry
"Pig at the Ritz" its name-ey

Ms. Upton took him in her rig;
To town to spread his fame-ey
No - Tor - I - Et - Ty
No - Tor - I - Et - Ty
No - Tor - I - Et - Ty
To town to spread his fame-ey

But now poor Grunty's in the brig;
His farmer is to blame-ey
B - L - A - M - E
B - L - A - M - E
B - L - A - M - E
His farmer is to blame-ey

In muck Ms. Upton danced a jig;
With foot-and-mouth aflame-ey
N - Fec - Ted - U - See
N - Fec - Ted - U - See
N - Fec - Ted - U - See
With foot-and-mouth aflame-ey

Then where poor Grunty liked to dig
Inside his pen she came-ey
S - Tu - Pid - It - Ty
S - Tu - Pid - It - Ty
S - Tu - Pid - It - Ty
Inside his pen she came-ey

Now Grunty can't go to his gig;
He hangs his head in shame-ey
Quar - N - Teen - Ed - He
Quar - N - Teen - Ed - He
Quar - N - Teen - Ed - He
He hangs his head in shame-ey

The DEFRA folks don't give a fig
They'd kill him just the same-ey
X - P - D - Ent - Ly
X - P - D - Ent - Ly
X - P - D - Ent - Ly
They'd kill him just the same-ey

I think that they should leave the pig
And take away the dame-ey
Let - Poor - Grun - T - B
Let - Poor - Grun - T - B
Let - Poor - Grun - T - B
And take away the dame-ey

line breaks added by mudelf ;-)