Looks like I can't stay away - guess my attempt at leaving was unsuccessful so from my view point, I guess the Mudcat still has more for me that I thought it did...

Is Mudcat like all the others? I doubt if any of us can honestly answer that. I suspect Mudcat is unusual in it's very open policy but I doubt that this is the only site where freindships have developed... even the Paltalk "live and unplugged" rooms organised a web site with pictures of members, other information and I believe either have held or intend holding a gathering of participants, the alt.banjo newsgroup is currently working on a project where a CD will be made from recordings of various users of the group - amazing co-operation (and for what they propose as $10 should be great value)...

Mudcat friendship is real to me and I value the people I have met here Here are some recent personal examples of what I hae found here: disregarding my comments about the music on the night I went to the Jug, I met great people, genuine real hugs, Bill Sables (he told my mum) really wanted me to see the friendships in person, Micca greated me with a picture of "MY" dog sent to me from Jenellen..., I needed a specific sound card - Micca gave me the one I needed and someone else offered to complete a transaction on EBbay for me if I found a suitable card and the seller would only ship to the US, I talked about possibilites of getting to the Getaway and an anonymous Mucatter sent me a sum of money in dollars to help me, when I announced I was leaving, I had a few personal messages from people wanting to keep in touch and giving me email contacts - some I didn't even expect and had not entered into much if any personal correspondence with...

I guess what I'm trying to say is freindship here can be incredible and I would say that the kindness of some here has run beyond anything I could ever forsee but I also think it is probably wrong to think that Mudcat is the only place where such things happen - in my case, the closest friend I have in Mudcat was acutally "met" on the rec.music.celtic forum before I joined here.

OK, so why would someone like me who sees so much good here decide to opt out? It is certainly true (as I think spaw suggested) that there is more going on in my life and for the better now than there was even 4 months ago so maybe my need reduced (if that is the case, Mudcat did fill a need no longer reqired). It would also be fair to say that I'm not fond of the priorities as given by Jeri above (I see it that way music has become secondary) but I can live with that. We get flamers and trollers but so what? Mudcat gets away lightly!...

What I was failing to handle was the constant resurgance of old topics and the circular patterns which seem to me more symtomatic of matters that are always lying under the surface and, after a flare up, die down to be rekindled, involve members fighting members and no real resolution and I suspect more bitterness creeping in under the surface.

I have taken an experimental step in view of the last problem re healing threads. I have just bought 40Mb of web space which can handle forums (ASP/ODBC compliant). Is anyone interested in trying to take any of the more contentious areas like healing threads off the Mudcat main forum but keeping them (I'm quite happy to impose a condtion on membership) only for the use of Mudcatters? If so, let me know and I'll see what can be worked out.

Jon