Back in the last century, a young girl was being courted. As was the custom, the boy asked her to go for a ride in his buggy. It was winter, and the girl had recently lost her gloves. So, before she left home, her mother told her, "If your hands get cold, just put them between your legs. That's the warmest part of your body."

As it happened, the boy had lost his gloves, too. After a mile or so of keeping his hands on the reins, he said, "Boy, are my hands cold!"

The girl said, "Why don't you put your hands between my legs? My mother said that's the warmest part of my body."

The boy does so, and soon his hands are comfortably warm. Then he has an idea. He says, "Boy, is my penis cold!" (You can guess the result . . .)

Later, at home, the girl asks her mother, "Mama, what do you know about penises?"

Mama, quite shocked, says, "Well, why don't you first tell me what YOU know about penises?"

The girl thinks a bit and says, "Well, when they're frozen stiff, they're really kind of nice. But when they thaw out, they sure make a mess!"