Kendall, judging from the above, it would seem that there isn't; but there is about to be. We are going to write one right here and now. Someone needs to complete only one small portion of the following and then allow someone else to continue with another small addition. We'll see if maybe we can create something new.

Two (fill in the blank) were discussing the problem of (fill in the blank). The first one complained that (fill in the blank). The second one...(I'll leave you guys figure out the rest)