Hi Mudshark1,

This doesn't often happen, but your response was almost exactly what I had expected, and goes a long way to confirm my reading of your character. The only thing was, it was a piece of deepest irony and you never noticed. The actual advice was contained in the last paragraph. My pseudonym should have given you a clue; your own words, remember? So super intelligence isn't one of your many attributes.

You are obviously living in a house which is awash with unstable female hormones. Puberty and menopause are troublesome times, for the person experiencing them no less than for all within range. Nobody commands respect from a teenager for a third person. You either form a relationship or you don't. You must have known that your wife came as part of a package deal. Did you expect her just to ditch the kids? You could have been building a relationship with the children while you were courting her. Maybe she did just want somebody to support her children if their father isn't doing so. Throughout history women have done whatever is necessary to safeguard their children. I would guess, though, that she was looking more for emotional support and thought you could provide it.

I would guess that you've got another five years of high drama before those girls turn into charming young women. Of course it's perfectly reasonable to insist on your own personal space, but why does there need to be a power struggle beyond that? It sounds to me as if you rushed without thought into a ready-made family and then realised that it is not what you wanted. The most honourable thing would be to tell her so and then split.

Everybody else seems to be very sympathetic towards you. I'm sorry to differ, but I read your posts very carefully and found them full of self-praise – "Sensitive, affectionate, decent buckaroos, good looking". It didn't sound like a man broken in spirit. It sounded like someone who can't get his own way. On the other hand there is not a single positive or sympathetic word for your wife. Surely there must have been some reason for marrying her only three years ago. Telling her she's cold will hardly make her feel sexy. Have you tried telling her she's beautiful? If nothing else she must be pretty devastated at hitting the menopause so early. It does have a way of making you feel like a dog.

How kind of you to be interested in my totally fictitious persona. If you want a relationship without all those nasty hormones I could be just right, but you'll probably need a special pair of glasses to see me. Ever since I got to fifty I've been gradually been becoming invisible (it's been years since I could get served in a bar) and can now only be detected by salesmen, Jehovah's Witnesses and my own daughters, whose support and encouragement never wavers.

My greetings to your wife, and tell her from me that there are worse things than loneliness.