As I understand it, Liz, the programme begins with a *stew hurling contest* on the Friday afternoon. Followed by *indoor tent pitching & campfire-lighting*. The night will be rounded off with a *hamster-bake*. Spot the snorer during the dark hours. Saturday will kick off with *everybody back to own beds* for the compulsory *kazoo player bashing ritual*. The *Over 80s Nude Leapfrog* is cancelled owing to local statutes, but will be replaced by a talk *How Not To Hypnotise* (please bring own banjo) then its off to the pub to meet & displace the locals. The "Dog & Bucket" has set aside their "quiet room" for a melodeon & shantie session, and the ladies singaround will be in "the-main-bar-downstairs-next-the-gents". Back to the Jonathon King Memorial Scout Hut for *all-in wrestling & vegetarian chilli supper*. Sunday begins with a non-denominational dwile flonking service(again, bring own banjo). Goodbyes, name calling, and recriminations to follow the *camp striking ceremony* tho the more "camp" among you will probably wish to leave beforehand. Survivors descend on the town and set up alternative tea shoppe ensemble.