Curmudgeon: A fuller version:

Long and thin goes too far in
And doesn't please the ladies.
Short and thick will do the trick
And bring out proper babies.
Our Mary did it once.
Once was once too many.
Wasn't she a silly dunce?
Did it for a penny.

(Tune: "Pop Goes the Weasel")

*

When the weather's hot and sticky,
Then it's time for dunkin' dickie.
When the frost is on the punkin,
That's the time for dickie-dunkin'.