Send Me Down To Santa's Chair
(Send Me To The 'Lectric Chair)

Well listen now Momma, I been bad
And don't deserve no Christmas toys
I like peekin' at the little girls
And beatin' up on the boys
And just last week, I stole some stuff
From that deli down the street
I been mouthin' off, and givin' guff, don't deserve no Christmas treat,,,,

Now Moms, Moms, oh listen to me Moms
Send me down to Santa's chair
He got big 'ol goons with brass knuckles Moms,
Waitin' for me there
First they'll frisk me up and down
Then they'll grab me by the scruff
Then they'll plop me down in Santa's lap 'til the tears start runnin' off
Now Moms, Moms, I'm pleadin with you Moms
Send me down to Santa's chair

Well now Santa's scary, there is no doubt
And his henchmen they are heavily armed
Ain't no crap gonna float down there
He don't buy no childish charm
Last year you know I tugged on his beard
And he was not too pleased
And now he's ringed, with burly dudes, who'll knock you to your knees,,,

Yes Moms, Moms, oh I deserve it Moms
Send me down to Santa's chair
Ain't no more pinchin' Santa's cheek
Or catchin' him unaware
Now they ask you twenty questions
All the truths back in your past
And if you tell them lies my friend I tell ya' you won't last
So Moms, Moms, oh sweet Jesus Moms
Send me down to Santa's chair

Well since I last saw Santa, I been real good
Got my halo cleaned and pressed
No more trouble in the neighborhood
Ain't give nobody no stress
Since Santa's helpers, straightened me out
I been one good little boy
It's better yes, to act so nice, and spread a little bit of joy,,,

Thank You Moms, Moms, I'm so happy Moms
Since you sent me down to Santa's chair
I hope my angelic qualities
Ain't too much for you to bear
Well Santa he plain told me
If I didn't act just right
That his boys would come and visit in the middle of the night
So Moms, Moms, it worked on me now Moms
You sent me down to Santa's chair

Not EXACTLY to the topic. Sure was fun though

Clifton