Brian, Your song reminds me of a feature Saturday Evening Post used to run, called "Tales Mein Grossfodder Told Me. It was stories told in part English, part German, and part made-up English words that sounded like German. The "tales" were hilarious.

Robinia, while I do love hearing songs in their original language and sometimes translations seem awkward, I can think of quite a few songs that have been translated pretty literally without sounding much the worse for it. "Un Flambeau, Jeannette, Isabelle" and "Es Ist Ein' Ros' Entsprungen" ("Lo, How A Rose E'er Blooming") are examples, as is the familiar "Frere Jacques"/"Are You Sleeping?" round that children sing.

Genie