From the other side of it, I once picked up a lovely quote from somewhere which served nicely to finish a book I was writing (don't have a go at me for that, Pat - any idiot can write a book!).

It concerned the lady in a supermarket who bustled up to the check-out girl with a bottle of champagne, and burbled self-importantly : 'it's for my husband - he's finished his book!'

The check-out girl looked up with an air of professional disinterest and responded: "Ah.... he's a slow reader, is he?" !!!

All the best - Ian B