Hmmm... let me try my hand at that Hallmark doggerel:

When dear Aunt Marge, who's plump and jiggly,
Goes and wipes the Piggly-Wiggly,
"Have a great..." she's sure to say
"...Whatevertafuck 12-__ Day!"

or

"Whatevertafuck you do, my friend,
Whatevertafuck you say,
You know I'll wish for you the best
Whatevertafuckin' day!"

Yeah, I could see that on a card with an illo of a disgustingly cute kitten!