Various people were commenting on the Ducks of Magheralin a few weeks ago. Here's the update!

THE DICKS OF MAGHERALIN
It was just about a year ago that I went to Magheralin
The kerbstones were red, white and blue, the flags blew in the wind
Such hallions as were on the street would grace a looneybin
Sez I "Who are these boyos?" "They're the dicks of Magheralin"

CHORUS:
Oh it is a grand oul' city in the grand oul' Irish style
But I'd give it a wide berth, me boys, of six or seven miles
Such a bunch of in-bred keowboys you'll not see their likes again
The slack-jawed snattery poghals, the Dicks of Magheralin

Well one comes up and sez, sez he "Through here you will not pass
Or me and may compadres will kick your Fenian ass"
So I went back the road to home as fast as blew the wind
For I wouldn't like to tangle with the Dicks of Magheralin

CHORUS

Of all the bitter hamlets in Ulster's bitter heart
Magheralin's the bitterest, it really is quite tart
To burst their bitter bubble would take more than a pin
The boys who breathe through open mouths, the Dicks of Magheralin

CHORUS

To finalise my story, and bring it to an end
Its tarnished reputation you must not try to defend
For you'll struggle in your quest to find a bitterer little town
Magheralin will never win the Star of the County Down