There are many theories about why we choose certain mates. I don't know that I buy any of them. Harpgirl is probably better qualified to comment on this than I am. 1. We pick someone who can best recreate the pain we felt as children, then, at the same time, we expect them to play that part AND to make it go away. 2. Marriage is the completion of childhood. 3. Men marry their mothers. 4. Women marry their fathers. 5. Women are attracted to men who look like they have good genes. 6. Men are attracted to women who LOOK good in Jeans. (same idea, different approach) This should start an interesting discussion.