Is it right for those governing, to attach their inept moral judgements on my belief system?

I think there are two sides to this line - since I am married I'd have to argue, most gently of course, that it is not a morally inept judgement. (I'm grinning here - OK?) But I have also cohabitated and thought that was morally OK.

But the deeper issue for me and my partner was that we wanted the paperwork to make a statement about our level of commitment to each other. It is a tad more difficult to walk away from a marriage contract (and it is indeed a contract) than to pick up and move with no legitimacy socially to a portion of the union's resources. We are also clear that true partnerships are made in the heart. We felt that what we had, and what we would achieve, deserved formal protection by the sanctifying ritual of state marital conditions being met. So we made that choice.

I think that substantive change is in the wind for partnerships achieved outside of the state sanctioned union. But all of that social change, and yes Folkies we are about that, comes at a price. The price for you Rebel is the loss of insurance for your partner. I'm sorry for that but I also know that the first person to set in the front of the bus down South found she had friends and the more they made noise - well you know history as well as I do.

What I would encourage is that you begin a "Tort Claim." A suit filed on "behalf" of all partnerships. It is how we Viet Nam Veterans were finally able to sue the chemical companies that killed so many of us. But don't expect rapid change - it took us a lot of years to achieve this. And the long term piece of this is a much more responsive system to meet veteran's needs. Just a thought - just takes someone willing to give up their life and go after this.

And the reason we have marraige is because of our Puritanical roots. We have another couple hundred years of evolution to get beyond those straight laced beginners!!

Best of Luck to you Rebel!!

Steve