The sun rose like a glorious blueplate special over Billings, nitrogen and helium, light and heat, traveling high in the sky and oblivious to the machinations of all below. The road- weary travelers pulled into the rest stop and clambered over empty cans and bottles to exit their vehicle. It wouldn't be long now.
"Are you sure this is the place?" asked the Bartender
"Yes" replied the Heron.

Behind the rest station, the free coffee, and the map proclaiming "You Are Here" with its fervent red "X", ran the Yellowstone river. Near that very river, at that very rest station, rested the Picnic Table Oracle of I-90.
"That's it?" asked the Heron, looking disappointedly towards a solitary figure sitting cross- legged on a riverside picnic table. "You think there would be flashing lights or something.."
"I dunno, buddy," said the Bartender, "That one looks like trouble."
"Well then, we're in luck" replied the game bird, "Because trouble is my middle name."
"Uhhh, no it's not....your middle name is Go"
"Why, I do believe I will..." and with that the bandy-legged bird waltz-wobbled bandlessly across the frozen grass.

The flashing lights became evident upon closer inspection of the curious figure sitting on the table. The oracle appeared to be wearing one of those goofy flashing holiday headbands with reindeer antlers attached.
"My antlers?" spoke the Oracle "If I told you they were the end result of a karmic smack- down of cosmic proportions... you wouldn't be surprised."
"Why, you're right, I wouldn't be...." the Heron took a worried step back, under the base assumption that a mere increase in physical distance would cloud the Oracle's sight. Maybe the Bartender had been right about this one?

"It's not a waste, you know" spoke the Oracle, stretching her legs out and turning on the table to face the slowly retreating Heron "Only that man's life is wasted who lived on, so deceived by the joys of life, or by its sorrows, that he never became eternally and decisively conscious of himself as a spirit.."
The Heron shook his head to clear his brain of the sight of the Oracle, and muttered "So those are your words of wisdom?"
"No" replied the Oracle "that was Kierkegaard. If I had to pick my own words of wisdom, I would have to say that it is incredibly-credibly hard, if not damned near impossible, to meditate after you've just taken 'non-drowsy' cold medication..."
"I'll remember that" said the Heron
"I'm sure you will." said the Oracle