Aaah shite, now ye went an' got me shtarted -
Gossoon: "Ma, is Santy Claus an Englishman?"
Mudther: "Sure now Timothy wot in the wurruld would give yez such a silly notion as dat?"
"Well here we got t'ree dures an' seven windas in th' hoose, an' th' bloody man keeps a-comin' doon th' chimbley."