Sounds like you need another Stony Stratford weekender.
My occupation as a bus driver has on occasion seen me getting out of the bus to look at the destination blind to see whether I'm coming or going! This is usually caused by a passenger asking if I go to...... and that gets me wondering if I set the blind right. Often heard joke when I worked for Maidstone & District Bus Co.
(Passenger)Do you go to Maidstone, only it is written on the side of your bus?
(Driver)I've got India written on the tyres, love. I aint going there, either! Boom, Boom.