No Mrrzy, Kent and Sussex are in the bottom right hand corner of the British Isles, Cornwall is in the bottom left.

Smuggling, or freetrading, was a way of life all along the Coast.

And here is the Smugglers Song updated !

The Smugglers Song (revisited)

- with apologies to Rudyard Kipling

If you should wake at midnight, and hear the engines beat,
Don't go throwing back the curtains, or dashing in the street,
Them that ask no questions, isn't told a lie,
So watch the box my darling, while the Tranny Vans roll by.

A loaded, hired Tranny Van roaring through the dark,
With brandy for the parson, and baccy for the clerk,
Special Brew for the Millwall fan, Campari there for Di.
So watch the box my darling, while the Tranny Vans roll by.

Fag cartons in the hallway, callers after dark,
You don't need to worry until the Rotwiellers bark,
Look Satan's here, and Fang is here, see how still they lie,
Its quarantine for doggies, while the Tranny Vans roll by.

While strolling round the lock ups, if perchance you see,
Cartons of strong liquor, and other things that be,
Don't call your neighbours over, or use them in your play,
Just put the plastic back again, they'll be gone next day.

If you should meet the Customs Men, dressed in blue and gold,
You be careful what you say and careful what is told,
If they call you darling, and ask about the gin,
You don't know no nothing, nor where no one has bin.

If you can keep it buttoned up, likely there's a chance,
You will have a special trip, all the way to France,
To see the hypermarket, and load the booze and food,
A journey in a Tranny Van, a reward for being good.

A loaded, hired Tranny Van roaring through the dark,
With brandy for the parson, and baccy for the clerk,
Them that ask no questions, isn't told a lie,
So watch the box my darling, while the Tranny Vans roll by.

Gareth

( Writen in Sarf Lundon dialect - Tranny Van, the ubiqueous Fort Transit Cargo Van. Fag (Eng Slang) = Cigaretts Lock ups = strings of garags or other storage spces, much loved by villans for storing goods etc. Buttoned up = keep yer mouth shut.)