I am going to make a few generalisations here, please ignore them where they do not apply to your experiences.

One of the great pleasures in my life is to make music with people I do not know, or those I have met only occasionally at informal gatherings like sessions and singarounds. I find it a rewarding experience to communicate with them through music. I don't care what type of music is played, only that I can make some positive contribution to it..If I feel I cannot make a positive contribution, I don't play but just listen. It doesn't really matter to me what level of proficiency people have, it is more important that they feel they want to contribute.

What is important is to recognise what the purpose of the exercise is and to have the manners and consideration towards others to enable all the different players, instruments, styles and levels of expertise to produce music together.

When it works it is wonderful, maybe for only a few short minutes, but it is worth it... It usually works best when it is spontaneous,,, better when it is loosely planned and not at all when planned, structured and led.

The more obvious the leader or leaders are the more inhibited the participants playing become. The more obviously friendly to each other, the leaders are and the more banter that passes between them, the more inhibited the participant becomes.

When you are playing flat out, in a session that works and the music is good, life feels that it could not get much better.

What would you see though, if on the other hand, you were to walk in to that same session, hoping to play and it was in full swing????????

You would see a number of people obviously enjoying themselves, facing each other, around a table, with their elbows sticking out and with their backs to you.

You could force your way in, if you were desperate and confident enough, but it would be more likely that you left.

A few chairs facing out and few kept empty might make a difference?