You didn't look at my picture, then.

Many years ago I raised a moustache--long, and waxed, and turned up at the ends like Salvador Dali--at the urging of the then-girlfriend, who said that "A kiss without a moustache is like an egg without salt."

My mother kept after me, urging that I shave it. The day I broke up with the girlfriend I drove home and shaved it. At the end of the day I drove to my mother's office and gave her a ride home. I mentioned there was something new. She guessed this, she guessed that, but never came up with the fact that I'd shaved the moustache until I said, "It's as plain as the nose on my face!" THEN she tumbled!

Dave Oesterreich