Apart from the obvious , memorable, Biology teacher with a lighted taper in his hand saying "Is this ether Flammable?" as it set light to his sleeve!!!
I am not sure these qualify as "said" but they are in this weeks staff Buletin at the College where I work here in the UK
" Senior Tutors will conduct NRA moderation" ( I think ) I hope) it means something different than in the USA)
" Youth Offending Team" ( I can think of a few I would like to offend)
"Potential members must be over 18 years old and have an interest in young people ( mmmmm, not sure about this either, after the recent fuss we have had about "interests in young people" in the Catholic Church etc)