The flavor of GUEST posting that keeps coming through as unsavory, to me, is the constant theme of controlling others. As above, where it is suggested that s/he has been able to make people stop saying things s/he has decided are bad. Problem is, the behavior may have been temporarily controlled, but the heart has not changed.

The desire to control is rigid, and strategies in that regard are not intelligently accurate because it is a one-trick solution based on making the controller feel better for the moment. There are lots of ways to assist people who want to change, and most people do want to change despite the appearance they give. But hollering "STOP YOU BAD!" is seldom one of the effective ones. Real change happens in the crucible of closeness, and increased closeness is not facilitated by gagging someone as soon as you are close enough to do it!

~Susan